Posting Pauses.

Disclaimer: Please don't be alarmed by this post. It's just a little explanation of why I've been so MIA lately. I'm doing okay, really. :) Loves!

I have tried to write a new post several times this month. Every time, I end up deleting it. It's not that I don't have anything to say...I do. (It is that I don't have any fun photos, but I can deal with that.) It's mostly that in the last few months, communication has been a struggle for me. There are lots of reasons, but I'm not making excuses. So if my communication with you has dropped off the planet, please know it's not just you. It's everyone. I'm trying...I really am. I can't tell you how many times I've started an e-mail, been about to write a post, dialed a phone number, and before I push send or post or call...I just can't bring myself to do it.

I can't explain it, really, except that I just have needed a break. Not that I don't love you--rest assured that even when I don't post, I still check everyday to see if anyone's posted anything new (and get sad when you haven't...despite the fact that I haven't, either...explain that one?!) If you're my facebook friend, I check the news feed to see if you're up to anything new...I do all that. I just can't bring myself to do much more than write a few sentences in a wall post, and maybe a text message (but even those have been pretty scarce).

The truth is, my life has felt pretty upside down these past couple months, and I've needed some time to process...and really, I still do. I'm trying to figure out how I got to where I'm at and where I'm going from here and what to do in the meantime. So I can't promise that I'm gonna actually muster up the energy and motivation to write more frequently, but I am trying. Know that.

I just know that in the past couple weeks, my bestie has told me she was worried because I haven't returned calls or texts (not on purpose...it just happened), several friends have politely informed me that I am "it" (and have been for some time) in our game of communication tag (and believe me, I realize it), and I look at my blog and realize I haven't posted in ages...all these things (and others) add up to one big apology from me.

I'm sorry I haven't been a very good friend lately...I guess I've just needed to try to take care of me for a little while. And even though I have been terrible about communication, please know that I treasure every single one of you and your efforts to reach out to me, comment on my blog, drop me a text, call me (I even USUALLY answer the phone, unless I'm at work or have no voice or am exhausted, which has been the case lately), write on my fb, etc. If I owe you an e-mail or a phone call, keep bugging me about it! I will get back to you eventually. Things have been hard lately, but all I can say is Thank You. Thank you for loving me and caring about me and being a part of my life and sticking with me even when I am massively incommunicado! I'm sorry I've been a jerky friend, but know that I love you!

And I do know that THE BEST IS YET TO COME. Even (especially) when it's hard to remember that. :)

Excuses, excuses.

So, in a few minutes there will be a post explaining a little about why I've been thoroughly MIA from most everyone's lives lately, but I just wanted to give slightly more info first:

First of all, please pray for my co-worker, Celeste. The day after we came back to work from Christmas break (so, January 5th), she was supposed to come to a school with me in the morning to do a presentation. She called me at 6:45 AM to tell me she was having "weird medical symptoms" and was on her way to the ER. Turns out, overnight she developed Bell's Palsy, which is a very strange and troubling problem, resulting in the sudden and basically complete paralysis of the entire right side of her face. Her mouth droops, her eye can't blink--it's a pretty major problem. They think it is caused by some sort of virus causing swelling around a facial nerve, but no one knows for sure. She's had mostly numbness, but on and off she's also been in a great deal of pain. Please keep her in your prayers--she's an amazing woman, and much too young (26) and has been through too much (she went through Hurricane Katrina) to have to deal with this, and who knows how long it will take to subside.

Anyway, the point is, with that going on, it's been a bit of a crazy time at work, trying to make sure all her schools and programs are covered on top of my own schools and programs, etc. I have been working a lot, but in some ways, it's been a good distraction. :)

Secondly, I have been CRAZY sick for awhile now. I went on antibiotics before Christmas to try to kick my dumb cough, and I went back on antibiotics again this week, this time also adding steroids to the mix, in hopes that I could get my lungs back and get some sleep for once. I felt okay before I went on these meds, I just had a wicked cough that wouldn't allow me to get any sleep and I needed some help to kick it. Apparently with asthmatics (of which I am one), 50% of the time it is caused by some infection, so they always try antibiotics. Within about a day and a half, I felt like complete CRAP. I've taken a day and a half off work in the last two weeks (which, if you know me, I NEVER take sick days unless I'm WICKED sick) because I've been so exhausted and felt soooo lousy. It was like the antibiotics drew up this deep-seated infection so now I'm suddenly having symptoms--sore throat, more coughing, sneezing, blowing my nose 80 gazillion times a day--the whole works. Ewww. But my lungs are definitely doing better (yay steroids!), and I think the rest of this craziness is easing up a bit, so hopefully by the time I have to run next week's retreat, I will be feeling much better.

Third, lots of my friends and my family have asked if I've been so sick for so long because possibly my mono is flaring up again from being stressed out and sick. I think this is a definite possibility. I haven't had a flare up really since I first got it in high school, but I can't explain this crazy exhaustion any other way. :( So hopefully my lying low approach will work and it will settle back down soon.

Fourth, I am in the midst of helping prepare to run a young adult retreat for people all over Western Oregon (and elsewhere), so it's been a lot of thought and a lot of work and I'm trying to get my talk all figured out for it--I'll try to write more about that soon. :)

And then there's the whole life thing, but that's another story for another time. :)

Anyway, thanks for sticking with me despite my lack of communication, and I'll be back with everyone soon (hopefully). :)

Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts. Loves!

What the World Needs...

...is less arguing and more singing.

Meet Miss Olivia Rose Remien!

One of the BEST things about spending Christmas in Denver this year (besides hanging out with my family, of course) was the birth of my beautiful new baby goddaughter, Olivia Rose. Lots of you know my friends, Janna (Jennings) and Ryan Remien. Jan and I have been friends since we were ten years old and we went from elementary school through college together. Ryan and I worked together when I was a freshman and he was a sophomore, and I introduced them (the rest is history). :)

Anyway, this summer Janna called me and asked me to be the godmother of their baby who would be born in December. Of course I was totally honored and excited, even more so a few months later when we found out it would be their first little girl! :) When Jan heard my family would be spending Christmas in Denver (where they happen to live), she told me they would arrange to have her baptized while I was already there so I didn't have to make another trip (yay for me and my wallet!).

My sister, the amazing photographer, took this incredible picture of Olivia being baptized. All these photos were taken by Amy, and the even more incredible thing is that her lens is broken on her DSLR, so these were all taken from afar with her telephoto lens. Yep, she's amazing.

Miss Olivia was due on December 19th, but this little girl knows a good thing when she's got it--she decided not to come until the doctors induced Jan on Christmas Eve Eve. Once she got started, she didn't mess around; from the time they broke Jan's water until little Olivia was delivered was a grand total of 22 minutes. Yep, minutes. For all you mommies out there, Jan's doctor checked her and she was at almost 4 cm--literally TWO minutes later she was almost an 8 and feeling ready to push, despite the fact that the epidural had yet to kick in. So Olivia was born au natural (much to Jan's chagrin). But she is healthy and beautiful, 7 lbs 12 oz. :)

Unfortunately she's had a go of it already...30 minutes after this beautiful babe was born, the nurse was trimming her umbilical cord with a scalpel when Olivia kicked and wound up with a gash in her leg requiring four stitches (daddy was NOT happy). Then when the nurse came to visit at home right after Christmas, they discovered her little collar bone had been broken during the delivery. Luckily babies heal quickly, and her stitches are already out and she doesn't seem to have any pain at all from her collar bone, so things are looking up. :)
Jan called me shortly after she was born, but I was already on a plane to come visit! So I called her back when I landed, and the next morning my dad and I were their only visitors at the hospital. :) I got to hold her before she was even 24 hours old, which was pretty sweet. (Not often this happens with the babes of all my far-away girlfriends!) I got to spend some time snuggling her after she got baptized the Sunday after Christmas, and then Jan and Ryan had me over for 2 days while my sister and brother-in-law were working to "help" with the kids. To be honest, I'm not sure I was much "help"--I basically just snuggled with Olivia the whole time I was there (although I did spend some time snuggling Joe and Ben, too--we were all best friends by the time my sister came to pick me up on Wednesday night). It was wonderful. :)

The Remien Family: Ryan, Ben, Janna, Olivia, and Joe.

It was a GREAT part of my visit to Colorado, and Ryan made sure to make many pitches for me to move to Denver ("You know you could come hold her anytime if you lived here, Jen." Talk about hitting where it counts!). :) I love this little girl and I can't wait 'til the next time I get to see her and snuggle her...hopefully in March if all works out! In the meantime, welcome to the world, Miss Olivia! :)

A Forsman Family Christmas (and more)!

I know, I know, it's a week and a half late. And I also realize I haven't been posting very much. Sorry about that. When your life is sort of upside down and your camera is missing, posting goes waaaaay down on the priority list. I'll try to be better...but no guarantees. So let's just skip all the past few months and head straight to the holidays!

I've gotten to spend lots of MUCH needed time with my family the last two months. My mom came up for four days in November to surprise my aunt for her 50th birthday...but mostly I think she just wanted to meet my new puppy (shhh...don't tell Aunt Linda). :) It was GREAT to see her and spend some time with her, and she helped me with my apartment, which was pretty much a giant crazy mess. You see, my apartment is tiny and I don't have a lot of money, so it's been a work in progress to get it to a point where it is more or less functional. Mom helped a lot.

Then, a week and a half later, she was back, this time with my dad, to spend Thanksgiving in the great Northwest. It was fun to see them and they spoiled me A LOT in helping get my apartment set up a bit more (apparently they don't think it's acceptable to live in an apartment with only three chairs, and two are kitchen chairs). I am now the proud owner of an awesome sleeper couch! :) Merry Christmas to me! My parents are so generous and wonderful (and I think they also understand the last few months have been pretty tough on me).

So a crazy few weeks later, Allee and I hopped a plane and headed to Denver. (Side note: Can I just say I have the BEST puppy in the WORLD?! She's amazing--I was totally nervous to fly with a 5 month old puppy, but she seriously didn't make a single peep in the airport, on the plane, anywhere! She was INCREDIBLE. I decided to fly with her because it was waaaay cheaper to just pay to carry her on than it would have been to leave her in a kennel, plus my sister wanted to meet her, since she picked her out for me! And this way I knew she was safe.) My sister is just finishing up her third set of clinical rotations for PT school, so she didn't have any time off; we decided to go to her for Christmas. Amy and Sterling were very generous and hosted my mom and dad and I and our two dogs for Christmas--and it was awesome! :) Amy had their little house decked out for the holidays and it was lots of fun to spend them in a new place. Minus the fact that I've been alternately fighting it and being sick for most of the past several weeks, we had a fantastic time. A few days I feel great, then the crazy coughing thing comes back--weird cycle. :/

Anyway, I didn't take a single photo, but I am stealing a few of my sister's to show you one of the coolest things we did--a sleighride!

Amy and I and our cute and incredibly generous Dad!

Amy called me a few weeks ago and said she had always wanted to do this sleighride up at Breckenridge, CO, so we talked our dad into taking the five of us the day after Christmas as a fun family outing. It was AWESOME. I was feeling pretty crappy that day (as evidenced by the photos...eek!), but it was so much fun. We went and loaded up the sleighs pulled by mules, and they took us up to a sheep camp where they served an amazing dinner and had live music provided by this guy:

He was a fantastic entertainer and a great singer--he did incredible impersonations of Johnny Cash, Neil Diamond, Elvis, Willy Nelson, and threw in a few Christmas songs, too. :) It was great. The food was incredible (I kid you not), and even though it was FREEZING outside, the inside of the sheep tent was nice and toasty warm. Amy and I even got to drive the mule team on our sleigh (go Ada and Agnes!). :) It was a total blast, and an awesome, Christmasy memory that we'll have forever. Thanks, Dad! :)

My cute sister and her hubby munching on the delicious caramel apple pie--one of the photos I DID actually take! :) Aren't they adorable?

My mom and dad and I on the sleigh! Just hear those sleighbells jingling...

Amy and Sterling, right after we got to the sheep tent. Their rosy faces tell the story of how cold it was outside (aren't you glad we convinced you to bring a coat, Ster?!).