Two Years! Yay!!!

Whew! Holy whirlwind weekend, Batman! :)

What? A decent picture of both of us? Is that possible??

I'm not really all about dating "anniversaries," but today marks 2 years since Erik and I started dating!! We decided we've been best friends for something like 4 1/2 years, and dating for 2 years today. I'll tell you more about this in a moment. But here's the weekend update:

Erik asked me to be his date to a wedding in Spokane this weekend (it was a CRAZY weekend!!), and I was going to come back last night, but I was persuaded to stay in the Tri-Cities for one more night so we could see each other at least for a few minutes today. If you've read my other posts, you know that he moved last weekend for about 5 weeks, so we're playing the long distance game right now, meaning it was GREAT to see him and spend the weekend together. Now 2 more weeks before we see each other for his sister's wedding. :) And I'm wicked busy these next two weeks, so it should go really fast!

The wedding was beautiful--both bride and groom went to Gonzaga and I know both of them, but Erik has gone to school with the bride since 5th grade. I've gotten to know her family a little bit through visits to Erik's hometown, so it was really fun to see them. We also went to a funeral that morning (Erik's uncle's father--his uncle who is married to his mom's sister, if that makes sense--anyway, his uncle's father died on Tuesday, so we went to the funeral), then we went to the funeral reception, which basically included his mom's entire extended family (thankfully I already know all of them and get along with all of them really, really well). It was nice to see them all. Then we went to the wedding, which was held at the church on Gonzaga's campus (yay to be back at GU!), and the president of the university did their wedding (he's awesome!!). The afternoon was a whirlwind of trying to beat the stifling heat, dropping our stuff off at the house we were staying at, hanging out at Gonzaga, and then heading over to the reception. The reception was held at the Davenport Hotel, which is, hands down, the nicest, fanciest hotel in Spokane. It was GORGEOUS. They had a catered, 3-course fancy schmancy meal, a 16-piece Jazz orchestra playing--it was awesome!! And even though it was a crazy night, since our friend was singing with her band downstairs in the hotel and we were trying to split our time between supporting her and being at the reception, we had a blast. The orchestra was awesome (big band/jazz-ish), and even though we only got to dance once, Erik asked me to dance!! Yay for awesomeness! :) (He's a great dancer and he knows I love to dance, so he's great about asking me when we're in situations like that--but hello! Yay!)

So quick random story: I SUCK AT DRIVING STICK-SHIFTS!!! But I swear I don't suck THAT bad...I just have no confidence. To make a long story short, we had to drive my friend Davey's car, and Erik doesn't drive a stick, period, and I haven't driven one for three years, but I was doing soooooo good...until we were driving it in downtown Spokane on Saturday night in pretty major traffic, managed to kill the car twice at one intersection, then the car started smoking. I'm not kidding. Like, BIG smoke. With bad smells. When the guy next to us yelled, "Hey! Your car's on fire!" we both started to panic a bit. Don't worry, it wasn't REALLY on fire. But just in case, we managed to enlist a nearby JAG lawyer passing by and we pushed the car off to the side of the road and called Davey, who walked to where we were and drove the car to a parking spot. We think it's fine, but sheesh!

Anyway, the weekend also included some strawberry picking with our friends, Nicole and Cort, and sleeping all the way back to the Tri-Cities in the backseat of the car while his dad drove.

So, we've been dating for two years, I have no idea where this is going or what will happen, and I'm not in any big hurry to get married (just so we're all clear). We've definitely had our ups and downs (like any relationship, right?), but you guys! He's awesome and I love him a lot. And he's definitely got his sweet, romantic side, which I've been blessed to see on a number of different occasions. So here's the latest:

He LOVES baseball, right? And he collects baseball caps, and there's very specific conditions to his collection, which we won't go into here, but I knew there was a particular hat he's been eying for about six months, so I decided to give it to him for our little two year anniversary. I didn't really expect anything from him (like I said, we're not really all about the silly "anniversaries"), so I wrapped it up, wrote him a sappy lil' love card, and put it on his bed last night. I knew he had seen it, but he didn't say anything. Then he went in his room and shut the door. About 20 minutes later, he came into the computer room where I was checking my e-mail, and said, "Thanks for the present on my bed! I didn't open it." I was like, "Well, you should open it, silly!!" (I gave it to him last night because I didn't want to do it when we were all tired this morning since I had to leave at the crack of dawn.) He said, "Okay, come on!!" So he drug me into the room where I was staying, shut the door, and on the bed was the gift I gave him with his card, and another gift wrapped up on the bed for me!! :) Yay!! So he gave me the sweetest card, and then told me to open mine first. Now, when I decided what to give him, I thought I could either go creative and sentimental, or I could just get him something I knew he really wanted. Obviously I went with the latter. He, however, totally went with the former, and it was PERFECT!! For about the last 4 years, but especially since we started dating, whenever we say good night to each other, whether in person, on the phone, e-mail, etc., we always say, "Sweet Dreams." (There's a reason, but it's not important.) So he got me this adorable (and totally girly--I love it!) sign (about 2 feet wide and a foot tall) that says, "Sweet Dreams." I LOVE IT!! It's totally perfect. And when I said that, he said, "You can hang this by your bed, and even when we can't be together, when you see it you can remember that I love you and I'm wishing you sweet dreams." How cute is that?!? :)

By the way...two AMAZING things:

1) Skinny Cow Fudge Bars: 100 calories of pure, 98% fat free deliciousness.

2) Jello Dulce de Leche Pudding Snacks: 60 Sugar-Free Calories of Heaven.

Just in case you were wondering. Trust me. You won't be disappointed.

Giant Stressball, That's Me.

Oi vay. Not gonna lie, I'm totally freaking out about this whole Vacation Bible School thing. Isn't that dumb? But it's a week and a half away and I don't have enough volunteers, don't have all my supplies, and DON'T feel very organized. Oh geez. Ugh. I hate being in charge of things like this when I have never done or really even seen it before, and the adults at the church I work at are not really what you'd call reliable. Don't get me wrong, I have a few AWESOME volunteers who are VERY good at what they do, but there just aren't enough of them!! They just want to be very hands off when it comes to things with their kids. You'd think I would have caught on to this whole not wanting to step up to the plate thing when I couldn't get enough teachers for Sunday school until we were already a month into it.

Ugh. Don't worry. I don't need to be reassured that everything will be okay. I know that somehow it will. I just need to vent. And I need it to be July 11th at 12:30 PM RIGHT NOW so this whole thing would just be OVER.

Apple to the Rescue!

GREAT NEWS!!!! The sad face is gone!!! I don't know how or why or what happened, but I took my iPod in to the Apple Store (which, technically, I think you're supposed to have an appointment or something...oh well), and the girl asked me what was wrong with it, took it into the back for about 20 seconds, and voila! Fixed. Happy day! How in the heck am I supposed to survive the gym without some tunes? Sheesh! And it was FREEEEEEEE, and that's the best part, because I thought for SURE I'd either have to pay a million dollars to get it fixed or buy a new one entirely, and neither of those are in my budget right now. Happy day!

Love it!

I love my new blog! By that, I mean the way it looks. Red's my favorite color, so I liked that about how the old one looked, but it just didn't feel very "me." But this, I LOVE!! :) Yay for finding a cute background!! I think this one's here to stay...at least for awhile.

And in other news...my iPod is giving me a frowny face with a web address: www.apple.com/support/iPod.

This is NOT good news.

Only help someone pack if you want to miss them less.

Erik left tonight. *sigh* He thinks I'm being a huge nerd for being sad that he's gone, and you know what? He's totally right.

We're going to a wedding together next weekend in Spokane, so I'm spending a couple days with him. Then two weeks later is his sister's wedding, so I'm going to the Tri-Cities that weekend, booking it up there as soon as VBS ends to hopefully make it in time for the rehearsal dinner.

Then it's my birthday...not sure if I'll see him then, but I hope so!...but then two days later is Creation (Creation Festival NW is a GIGANTIC Christian Music Festival held at the Columbia River Gorge--4 days of sunshine, friends, and music=GLORIOUS!!), and I am officially GOING!! And here's the best part--it's "work" so I'm going FOR FREE!!!! Weeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! Seriously, it's awesome. At least 2 of my favorite bands will be there...not to mention about 50 other bands!!! I went last summer for the first time ever, and it was FANTASTIC!! And crazy hot, but who cares?!? Especially after the Portland dreariness, I could move to Las Vegas and bake in the heat all year with April and never get sick of it! Anyway, Erik pretty much always goes to Creation, so unless something crazy happens, I'm sure I'll be spending 4 days with him then (along with the other young adults we'll be taking as "Young Adult Ministry"--the best part of my job, hands down. I get paid to hang out with people my age. Okay, so we're supposed to talk about God, too. We do...usually. :) Anyway...).

Then the next weekend is my cousin's wedding in Montana, and I think Erik's going to go with me, so we totally have the best possible situation in terms of long-distance dating.

So about the title of this post. All week we've been packing and cleaning and getting him ready to go. He has an interesting housing situation, and it turned out that he's actually leaving all his stuff in the house (his roommates aren't moving for awhile, apparently), so we packed him all up, but didn't move anything, except to get it all out of the way. Day 1 and Day 2 of packing were really fun, actually. We were playing and working and taking breaks and enjoying each other. Day 3 we took off and went on a date instead. Day 4 was fairly productive, but we were both sort of tired of it...by last night (Day 5)...eeek. We were both tired and frustrated and sick of packing, and since we were the only ones there, we were definitely taking it out on each other. Finally I offered to head home so we could both have a breather, and instead we decided to take a deep breath and remember that it was the packing we were sick of, not each other. Then it went a lot better, and a lot faster. We got his car packed up this morning, his roommate made us all an awesome brunch, and then, as a suprise thank you for helping him all week, Erik took me to see "Get Smart!" He's good like that, and it was awesome to spend a few stress-free hours together doing something fun before he hit the road. (And we both totally enjoyed the movie by the way--it's pretty funny!)

Alas, then it was time to say goodbye, and I headed to work (yep, on a Saturday. Lame, I know. And I'm working tomorrow, too.) and he headed to the Tri-Cities. He left me a message letting me know he made it, so he's officially gone now. I decided that packing people up for a move is God's way of helping making goodbyes easier--we have a frustrating, lengthy task to do together so we get annoyed and miss them less. The only trouble is, it only works for a few minutes. And don't worry, I still miss Erik. Even if I WILL get to see him again in less than a week!

Vacation, Part 2

So, horseback riding. I hadn't ridden in FOREVER, and lately it has been all I can think about. (Our ride in Vernal has cured me of that obsession, at least for a few days!) My mom's former co-worker has horses, so she called and asked if we could ride. He was pretty worried about it, because apparently one of his horses, Bailey, is quite gentle and easy to ride and the other...well, suffice it to say his name is Turbo. So my mom's friend was afraid one of us might get hurt. But Amy and I both used to teach horseback riding lessons, so my mom was confident we could handle it, and told him so. He wasn't so convinced, but he agreed to let us ride them anyway. We had a blast, going on a little trail ride and literally running and running and running the horses up and down hills and up and down the road, etc. It was GREAT!! I love to ride, because there's nothing quite like the feeling of the wind blowing through your hair, when the only things that matter in the world are you, the horse, and keeping your butt in the saddle. :) Hard to think about all the drama and craziness life throws at you when you're just trying not to fall off a huge animal hurdling down the road at breakneck speeds, eh?!

So I think my mom's friend figured out we really do know how to ride about the time we galloped up the road and stopped right in front of him. :) It was a great time.

Anyway, the rest of the time we just hung out with friends and fam, played my parents' Wii (which, by the way, if you haven't played with a Wii--soooooo fun!), and hung out. I highly recommend Wii Olympics. It's a blast. And watching Brookie box was pretty awesome, too! (Can I just mention how fun it is that my sister married the brother of a good high school friend, so now I actually see Brooke (Merrell) Alexander all the time!! Love it!)

Amy and I drove back the ol' Vail Pass way to Denver (also gorgeous!), picked Ster up, who'd been working in Grand Junction all week and missing out on all the fun, and headed out to dinner, then to visit Janna and Ryan and their kiddies.

Joe and Ben are AWESOME!! I've spent some time with Joseph before, and man is that kid adorable!! I've never seen a kid that age obsessed with Star Wars before, but he can't get enough. And Ben--what a great baby!! I don't think he cried the whole time we were there. They are sooooo cute. It was great to see Jan and Ryan again--twice a year is totally not enough. Jan and I have been friends since we were ten, and I introduced her to Ryan when we were freshman in college (Ryan and I worked together), so it's especially fun for me to see how they're doing and watch their family grow. :)

Anyway, Jan invited us over for brunch on my way to the airport, so she made us an awesome breakfast/brunch and we had a little photo op...that went on and on and on...that Joseph likes to be the center of attention! :) It was great to see them. Then my awesome sister and brother-in-law dropped me off at DIA, and it was the end of vacation for me.

The flight back was amazing, flying RIGHT next to the top of Mt. Hood as we came into Portland. It got even more amazing when my fabulous boyfriend brought me flowers at the airport and insisted on buying me tea at Starbucks! :) He's great. Then we went out for dinner and went to see "Kung Fu Panda" (which I HIGHLY recommend, by the way--it's hilarious!! And not just for kiddos, either).

So there you have it. That was my vacation. :) I feel like I just wrote a high school essay or something. :)

Utah + Colorado = VACATION!!!!

Despite the craziness of my last week (I promise this is the FIRST time I've actually had a minute to myself to sit down and write--and yes, largely that's my own fault, but that's neither here nor there), I'm actually writing this blog within a week of returning from vacation! I think that's pretty darn good! :) WARNING: This will probably be LONG, so read at your own risk!

So, here goes:

This is the first time EVER I will work a job year-round for 12 consecutive months. Usually I have summers "off"--at least off from whatever my typical gig is. This has literally been the case SINCE I WAS BORN. Maybe that's why I feel like I am NOT cut out for this 12 month job business. I NEED A BREAK!!! Geez.

Anyway, I was originally hired to work a 10-month contract, August 1-May 31, which followed in my typical pattern of having the summers to go on trips and have a summer job and play. However, toward the end of May, my job decided they wanted to change my contract and make it be a 12-month, year-round deal. (You can probably tell I have mixed feelings about this change of events.) It's nice for my wallet, not quite as nice for my sanity and vacationing needs. So at the end of May, my boss and I had a chat that went something like this:

Boss: So, Jen, starting July 1, you're now a full-time, 12-month employee. That means you'll be running Vacation Bible School.

Jen: So, you're saying you want me to run this giant program with about four days to plan it.

Boss: (clearly confused) Uhhhhhh.....What do you mean 4 days?

Jen: Well, VBS is scheduled for the second week of July, and I don't work here in June.

Boss: You don't work here in June?

Jen: Nope. My contract is up at the end of May.

Boss: Are you sure?

Jen: Yep. August through May. 10 months. So you're not paying me to work here in June.

Boss: Ummm....huh. Well....let me work on that.

After a crazy series of conversations, it was decided that I WOULD work there in June, but for some reason they "can't justify" hiring me to work full-time this month (but they can next year? Huh.), so I'm working 30 hours per week. BUT the good part about this change is that they told me I could stack those hours however I wanted, so I could take some time off. So basically I worked like crazy for two weeks, then took a week off, and have been just taking it easy ever since. (Does all this seem crazy to anyone else?) So the moral of the story: VACATION!!

My mom just had her first knee replacement surgery (second knee coming in August--and she's doing FABULOUSLY, by the way--only a week and a half later and she's already walking around the house WITHOUT crutches! CRAZY!), and she really wanted me to come home. Since I didn't think I'd be working at my job in June, I had told her it might be a possibility, but then it got a little trickier when the job sitch changed. I was also a little wary because we hadn't quite figured out when Erik would be moving, and I didn't really want to spend his last week here with me a plane-ride away. It all worked out, though, and I'm SO glad, because it was FUN!!

My sister is in Physical Therapy school in Denver, and she just happened to have a few days off, so logistically and financially speaking, it was actually a lot better for everyone for me to fly into Denver, then drive to Utah, so that's what we did. It was 95 degrees in Denver!!!!!! When I lived in Utah, 95 degrees was nothing to sing about--that's HOT!! But when you come from Portland where the sun is a rare occurance and we never saw spring, let alone summer, the sunshine is GLORIOUS!!! So I was basking in it's glow all week. Anyway...

You guys, my dad got this new job a couple years ago, working for a private company instead of for the BLM, and boy does he have connections!!! Thanks to my baseball-loving boyfriend and his extreme patience in explaining the game to me, I have become quite a fan of baseball, so my sister and I made plans to go see a Rockies game. Unbeknownst to us, my dad called his boss (who happens to live in Denver), and next thing we knew we had FREE tickets in the TENTH ROW!!!! It was AMAZING!!! If you ever have a chance to see a baseball game at Coors Field, DO IT!!! It's like a giant party--sooooooo much fun!

The next day we fiddled around in Denver for awhile, then hit the road. My sister and brother-in-law (Sterling) drive to Vernal quite a bit, but they've never followed Highway 40 all the way from Denver on home. Amy casually mentioned that sometime she'd like to take that route, so I said, "Let's do it!" And it was BEAUTIFUL!!! And really, it didn't take us any longer than the other way, which is supposedly sooooo much faster. It was totally worth it to go that way. There is NOTHING quite like driving through the middle of the Rocky Mountains.

We got to Vernal just a few minutes after my folks rolled in from SLC, chatted with them for a little bit (by the way...people on major narcotics are HILARIOUS!), and headed to bed. Thursday was mostly a "take care of mom" day (which largely fell to Amy, since my mom decided Amy's physical therapy student status meant she was clearly the most qualified to help her out--okay. Sorry you had to do all that, Meem!). But, when my dad got home, Amy and I went horseback riding!!!

To be continued in the next post....

Vacation Photies are up!

I promise my vacay blog is coming soon, but in case you're not on facebook, if you want to see the photos from my trip, here's the link:

Facebook Photies!

Enjoy, and this weekend I'll update. Promise.

The Definition of Cheesy.

If you want to know how I wile away the hours, check out this blog:

Growing in Faith Together

This is the blog I have to do for Vacation Bible School for work, and man, oh, man, is it EVER cheesy! Granted, I am trying to get little kids and their parents (and volunteers) to be excited, but holy over the top, Batman!

So, if you're bored and want a good laugh (at my expense...hee hee), you can see what I'm spending my time on. :)

Summer: The Season for Moving.

I have great things I want to write about, and I promise I will write soon, but this week is CRAZY, between coming back from vacation, having to catch up at work, and packing Erik up for his move. Yep, he's moving away this weekend for the summer. :( Sad day. Oh, how I love the dating long-distance business. (Can you hear the sarcasm?) Oh well. It's pretty short term, so that's good. (I said, "You're moving away for the next two months!" and he said, "A month and a week, Jen. Not two months." Silly me.) He'll be working baseball in Kennewick, which is about 4 hours away (which might as well be 40 hours away with the price of gas these days!). But actually, provided I can get off work, we're going to a wedding in Spokane the weekend after he moves, then two weekends later is his sister's wedding, followed shortly thereafter by my birthday (and hopefully I'll see him then...), so hopefully "long-distance" won't really be that long or distant, since we'll see at least a little of each other over the summer. Whatever. We'll survive--we've done it before, for much longer!! But I'm definitely soaking up my Erik time as much as I can this week, so unless I can find time while he's at work these next two days, my blogging might be delayed.

In the meantime, good news!! If I can make it just a few more weeks (which, at this point, is looking good), this will be the first time I have lived in ONE place WITHOUT MOVING for 12 CONSECUTIVE MONTHS since I graduated from high school!!!! And for a girl who HATES moving, this is AMAZINGLY GREAT NEWS!!!! :) Especially since my goal for the year was just to live in one place for ONE year--just 12 months without a move, that's all I wanted. Erik and I moved all my stuff into my roommate's house on July 1st last year, then I officially moved in on July 30th, so maybe my one month actually ends at the end of July. Hmmm. Anyway, looks like I'm finally going to get my wish! YAY!!!

A little John Denver, anyone?

, "Sunshine....on my shoulders....makes me happy!"

So, I'm not home yet, but here's a tiny little preview of my vacation for my blog. Suffice it to say, I have been BASKING in the Utah/Colorado sunshine, and it's making me have a hard time figuring out why in the heck I would ever choose to live in gray, rainy Oregon!! (Okay, okay, Oregon's not that bad, but I'm not looking forward to leaving the constant sunshine of the past five days.)


"Rocky Mountain high, Colorado...!"

Seriously, how beautiful are the Rocky Mountains? Sometimes I can't believe how awesome they are, and I can't believe I grew up practically right next to them! No wonder I can't get enough of the mountains!! The sky is big and gorgeous (hello, I AM a Montana girl at heart!), the weather's beautiful, and the landscape can't be beat. Glorious!! :)


And how adorable is my sister? We went horseback riding on Thursday, and it was GLORIOUS!!! We had such a great time, racing up and down the dirt road on horseback--so fun! And as much as I was ready to leave Vernal when high school ended, look in the background--isn't it pretty??

Let the tagging begin! :)

I've had a blog for like five minutes and I already suck at updating it! Argggh! My new resolution will be to update it much more often than I have been. And I did so well at first! Oh well...

The real reason I haven't been writing is because I'M ON VACATION!!! :) And there will be MUCH more to come as an update there, but not tonight, because it's ridiculously late and my sister and I have to get up and drive back to Denver in the morning. But I will do this:

I'm new to the blogging game, but evidently Renee "tagged" me...which I'm assuming means I'm supposed to do this, too. So here goes, and sorry if my answers aren't very good...lack of sleep will do that!

3 Joys - #1 - My family. Seriously, just like with any family, we have our moments of driving each other nuts, but the last few days at my parents house have been awesome. :) It's so nice to have people who are always there for you, even if they do make you a little batty sometimes! Mostly they're just amazing, amazing people, and I'm sooooo blessed that they're my family. #2 - Friends. The more I think about the amazing people in my life, the more I realize how blessed I am! God has put so many awesome people in my life, and I've learned soooo much from my friends. In college I learned all about the philosophy behind different kinds of friendship, and I know I have a lot deeper friendships with more people than many ever get to experience. There is nothing that can brighten my day more than a letter or an e-mail or a quick chat with a friend (or sometimes a long one...sorry, April!), especially when I'm having a tough time. And more and more I'm realizing what a blessing my girlfriends are, and how much I need them in my life (thanks, girls!). I'm a lucky, lucky girl. #3 - Music!! I have always loved music!! There are certain songs that, no matter how crappy my day is going, they always make things better. I LOVE to sing--I have literally sung for upwards of 15 hours making cross-country road trips by myself, to the point where I arrive at my destination losing my voice because I've been singing anything and everything the whole way. I sang and danced and did so much with music in high school that I got a little burned out and didn't do a lot with it in college (I did sing in the choir for a couple years and took guitar lessons all the way through), and one of my major regrets is that I didn't do more with it.

3 Fears - #1 - Not figuring out what I'm supposed to do with my life, AKA, THE FUTURE. I know God is calling me to something awesome that can be used for the good of people around me, but sometimes I feel SO lost trying to figure out what that is!! I hope I can figure out how to best use my skills and talents to make me happy, be able to support myself, and make a positive difference in the world. #2 - Getting "stuck." I know that sounds silly, especially since I'm such an advocate of "if you don't like it, try something else!" But it seriously does freak me out. What if I get stuck in some dead end job that I hate? What if I don't end up in a place I enjoy? What if my life stays in this weird stagnant place it's in right now? I know I have control over changing these things, but still...scary. #3 - Losing someone I love, especially my family or close friends. I've been thinking about this a lot lately, especially since my friend Austin died a few weeks ago (right after that I had a dream that it wasn't Austin, but my best friend and boyfriend, Erik, and it was horrible). I know that this isn't the end (the best is yet to come, right?), but selfishly, it hurts when we lose people.

3 Goals - #1 - To be in better shape (and probably to lose weight, too). I was doing SO well, and then I got in a car accident in August (I got rear-ended) and ended up with a wicked case of whiplash that I'm still trying to recover from. Then in April I tore all the ligaments in my ankle. So these two injuries have made being healthy and in shape pretty difficult, and it's driving me crazy!! I can't wait until I'm cleared to start running again. #2 - To figure out what's next, and to stop being scared of taking risks and next steps, whether this means moving, going back to school, finding something that fulfills me, etc. This is the year to do it! #3 - MUSIC!! I have put this aside for TOO long!! I really want to work on playing my guitar and singing A LOT more, and I want to learn to play the piano. I also really want to sing the Nat'l Anthem at some sort of sporting event. I'm not sure why this is my current focus, but it is. I think it would require some major bravery on my part...maybe that's why I want to do it, to prove to myself I can.

3 Current obsessions - #1 - Jodi Picoult books. I LOVE this author!! I first read "My Sister's Keeper," which is amazing, and I've read about 10 of her other books now. I can't put them down, and there's always some twist at the end. I love to read, and her style is great! (Although honestly, I'll read anything, and I'm ALWAYS looking for book or author suggestions. Hint, hint.) #2 - Horseback riding. I used to teach Western riding lessons, and for some reason it's all I can think about lately. I hadn't ridden in FOREVER, but my sister and I went last night!! And it was GLORIOUS!!! There's just something about flying down the road on the back of a horse that makes you feel so free. Hopefully last night's ride will help tame that desire for a little bit. :) #3 - LOST! Erik and I watch this show faithfully (practically the only show I see with any sort of regularity, thanks to my crazy schedule), and it's been our weekly date for the last two years. It is a CRAZY show!!!

So, there you go. Now it's waaaaaay past my bedtime...and I tag...um...April and Audri and whoever else wants to do it! :)

What's in a Name? A rose by any other name would smell as sweet...

What Jen Means

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you. You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries. You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Hmmmm...what do you think??

Rain, rain, go away...

AND DON'T COME BACK ANOTHER DAY!!! Seriously, it's June. And the high temperature for the week is FIFTY-EIGHT DEGREES!!!!!!!! What I wouldn't give for one sunny, hot summer day. Oh, Portland...

Do you ever wonder...

...how your life became what it is today? I've been thinking about that a lot lately. If you would have asked me 10 years ago what my life would be like today, I would NEVER have predicted this. If you would have asked me 5 years ago, I don't think I would have predicted this...I probably would have guessed something different TWO years ago. What does that mean???

10 years ago right about now I was on a trip with 11 other AMAZING people to New York City, exploring and seeing shows (LOTS of them!!) and hanging out with people I love and experiencing big city life--and even though I'm not a big city girl, I LOVED IT all!!! It was a huge adventure--one of the first I'd ever embarked on without my family with me--and I had a fantastic time. To this day that trip is one of my favorite experiences I've ever had. (Thanks, Coach!!) I was SO happy.

5 years ago I had just graduated college and was immediately starting graduate school. I was taking 3 intensive classes, meaning that I was in class all day, every day, for about 9 days, and got three classes out of the way just like that. It was an INTENSE week (being in class 12-16 hours a day is exhausting!!), but it was AWESOME!! I was learning about Teambuilding and Leadership, getting introduced to my Master's degree (Organizational Leadership), and really deeply involved in things that completely fascinate me. For that one week, I wasn't working (I took that week off so I could go to school), and I was totally intimidated being a 21-year old graduate student in classes where MOST of the other students were AT LEAST 40+ with LOADS of life/work experience. But again, it was awesome. And I knew in that week I'd made the right decision to get my MOL, because it was something I was totally interested in. Even though there was craziness, I was happy.

2 years ago, I was just about finished with my REACH year (year two of full-time volunteer work), in all-day, every-day music practice, spending hours and hours playing my guitar and singing (and pretending like I knew a little something about playing the electric guitar), and getting ready to run a week-long conference for hundreds of high school students. I was also secretly in love with my best friend (he knew, but no one else did), and looking forward to finally being able to date him as soon as our volunteer commitment was over. I had no idea what I was going to be doing when REACH ended, I had no job prospects and nothing figured out, but I was doing music everyday, hanging out with amazing people, and being in love. You bet I was happy!!

Now, what am I doing? Well, hopefully 2 or 5 or 10 years from now I can look back on this time in my life and think "I was happy..." but sometimes in the moment, it's hard to see that.

I'm currently getting ready to run Vacation Bible School at the church where I work. I won't bore you with the details, but the other day, I had a huge realization that, literally, the most important thing I did the whole day (in like 9 hours of work) was paint a giant lion that will eventually be a wall decoration. Seriously, how did I get here? Now, my boyfriend was very encouraging when I told him about this realization and he tried to help me feel better about my efforts (he had this awesome story about how, in the long run, maybe some kid will realize that s/he is loved or have some realization of God because I put this effort into the giant lion--God bless him!), but while I COMPLETELY get what he was saying, it's still kind of frustrating.

Is this really the best use of my skills and talents? Am I really happy working like CRAZY in a job that pays me so little I can barely afford the gas it takes to get me there every day? It's not about the money for me--it never has been. But I'm not doing music, I'm not traveling, I have nothing to do with leadership, I'm not even directly doing ministry--basically all the things that make life full and enriching for me have no part in my current life...or so it seems. Okay, okay, I think I'm exaggerating a little bit, but the point is, if this isn't where I'm supposed to be, where AM I supposed to be? And what am I supposed to be doing?? I NEVER intended this to be a long-term job for me, which is what keeps me going. And I DO know that the things I do are important in the long run, in terms of helping people come closer to God and know that they are loved, and helping people to understand and embrace their faith, wherever they are right now. I'm not totally unhappy, I promise. I think maybe "unfulfilled" is probably a better description. There are lots of times when I'm happy in my personal life. But "happy" as the overall term for my life right now? I'm not so sure...

And I guess I just really want to know...how did I get here? And what now??

If any of you have any brilliant ideas for me, I'm always open to suggestions...

I SO need a vacation!! Lucky for me...

Oh, man, this blog thing is crazy! I could waste WAAAAAAY too much time playing around with this...and I'm sure I will as I try to get the hang of it!

But that is SO not what this post is about! I'M GOING ON A TRIP!!! I have been ITCHING to travel lately (dang travel bug!!), and even though this is a QUICK trip, and one of necessity, I'm excited about it! I'm going to see my sister!! Yay!!

So, my mom is getting her knee replaced in Salt Lake on Monday (please keep her in your prayers!), and she basically decided that I want to come home and see her after her surgery. Note I said SHE decided, not I decided, but that's okay. My job is in a weird state right now where I'm just working part time for this month, so I can shuffle my hours around however I want and take some time off. However, I'm a procrastinator, so I didn't make the decision for sure to fly away to Utah (and Colorado...explanation coming) until last night...and we all know how ticket prices on flights go up, up, up the closer you get to the date of the trip! Well, I'm a moron, so exactly a week before I go I made the reservations. *sigh* I SWEAR someday I will learn to plan in advance...actually, probably not. :)

Anyway, it's quite a bit cheaper to fly into Denver than SLC right now (which is not normally the case), but this is EXCELLENT, because my cute sister and brother-in-law live in Denver, and she just happens to have a few days off PT school next week, which makes this an IDEAL situation. This way I get to see them, don't have to sit in SLC while my mom's in the hospital (how boring is that?!), and my dad won't have to drive me back out to SLC to take me back to the airport. And I'll get to meet Janna's new baby! So this is totally the best of all worlds.

So the plan is, fly into Denver on Tuesday (maybe go see a Rockie's game?!?!?!), drive to Vernal on Wednesday (hopefully my mom will get to come home on Wednesday, otherwise she should be able to come home on Thursday, so we'll probably see some high school friends on Wednesday or something), hang out in Vernal until Friday (probably), then head back to Denver either Friday or Saturday (depending on my sister's schedule...she might have to do a service project on Saturday), then I'll fly back to Portland on Sunday! Woohoo! I SO need a vacation, and lucky for me, this means I'm getting one!! Anyone want to play in Denver or Vernal next week?

Mr. Austin Sawicki

So, the real thing that finally pushed me to start this blog was the unexpected, tragic death of a college friend, Austin Sawicki, last Thursday. Austin was an amazing person, whose vibrant spirit and overwhelming joy touched every person he met. We were both double majoring in college, and one of those majors for both of us happened to be Religious Studies. I feel so blessed that, in Austin's too short life, because of our shared interests and the classes we had together, many, if not most, of our conversations centered on faith and God.

As his friends and family have been trying to cope with the aftermath of this terrible accident, people have been sharing stories and photos and memories of Austin and his incredible life. Austin had just finished his second Masters degree and was getting ready to go on a trip to Europe when he was killed on the job. As I've been reminiscing and sharing with friends and reading their stories and watching videos and looking at photos of Austin, I just hope that Austin knew how much he was loved while he was still with us. The love is overwhelming and a true testament to what an awesome person he was.

It also gets me thinking: I sure hope the amazing people in my life know how much I love them!! Sometimes it's hard to remember to take the time to tell people we love them, especially when our culture tells us to avoid that "yucky love stuff" (thank you, My Best Friend's Wedding!). Why does it take the death of a loved one for us to remember how much people mean to us? We are social animals--we're meant to rely on each other for love and support!! I am SO blessed to have incredibly loving, supportive, wonderful people in my life, and I hope I never take them for granted.

So, Austin, know that you'll be missed, but mostly, know that you are loved!! I'm so thankful for the short time we had together, and I'm so blessed to have known you. We used to have a class together called "Life Before God," about the spiritual journey, and Austin, I know you've reached the pinnacle of that journey, because with God, the BEST is yet to come, of course!!

And to all my friends and loved ones, I hope you all know that I love you. "I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy" (Phil 1:3-4).

Bandwagon, Here I Come!!!

Well, at the urging of my friends who have blogs ("Jen, why don't you have a blog?!?"), I'm jumping on the bandwagon. I'm not sure what I could possibly have to say that is interesting enough for other people to want to read, but hey, more power to you if you're interested in reading my ramblings!!

The truth is, I've always liked to write, and for some reason I've been sort of itching to start a blog these last couple months. Maybe it's just all the random thoughts in my head that I want to share. I'm not sure what exactly this will become, but just like the title says, the BEST is yet to come!!